Sea Food Alergy?

Following his initial toast, and a swift 208 units of alcohol, The Crab began to complain of stomach pain and retreated to the lavatory of the pub. At 2345hrs, the loo door had to be broken down as reports were heard that the Crab was trying to escape back to the ocean via the lavatory bowl. It soon became clear that The Crab was hugging the loo bowl and, rather than escaping, was storing some partially digested food for consumption at a later date (typical of the species). Thanks to the quick-thinking Mr B Brown (a local grower) this revolting behaviour was stopped by administering a cold shower (actually slightly warm) to the Crab's over-sized cranium.